− After the song, “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor
At first I was aghast, I was mortified
Being told that using adverbs was as good as suicide
And then I spent so many nights
Thinking how I screwed it up
But I got smart and I learned to suck it up
And so I’m back, no time to waste
I just deleted all the weaker verbs that slow the narrative pace
I will change that point of view
I will make my heroes flawed
And if I make the subtext understood, the end won’t seem so odd.
I’ll sabotage my characters
Give them hidden motives
To hell with editors
Who rejected me so many times all I did was cry
Did I delete? Did you think I’d personify?
Oh no not I. I will revise
As long as I can show, not tell, I’ll never summarize
I’ve got scenes to scandalize
And villains to disguise, and I’ll revise
I will revise, hey, hey
I froze my ass in Maine to learn how to plot
Kept sending monthly packets to be told I overshot
I stayed up so many nights
Gulping Ritalin and wine
To annotate, but now I hold my thesis high
And you see me, my MFA
I’m not that constipated writer who outlines every day
And so look out Stephen King
Nora Roberts better run
Cause I’m tossing out my aphorisms and all my dopey puns
I’ll sabotage my characters
Give them hidden motives
To hell with editors
Who rejected me so many times that all I did was cry
Did I delete? Did you think I’d personify?
Oh no not I. I will revise
As long as I can show, not tell, I’ll never summarize
I’ve got scenes to scandalize
And villains to disguise, and I’ll revise
I will revise, I will revise…
.
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Copyright © 2009 Linda K. Sienkiewicz
